Red Flags to Watch For With Aging Parents This Easter Weekend

Easter weekend often brings sweet moments filled with colorful eggs, too much chocolate, family laughter, and stories around the table. If you’re part of the sandwich generation, though, it’s also an opportunity to quietly observe how your aging parents are really doing.

When life is busy, it's easy to assume everything is "fine" if your parents say so over a quick phone call. But seeing them in person, especially in the familiar context of a family gathering, can offer subtle, telling signs of changes you might otherwise miss.

As you prepare the ham and try to keep the dog from eating all the Peeps, take a moment to notice these red flags with aging parents that may suggest it's time to lean in with a little more support.

1. Red Flags with Aging Parent: Changes in Appearance

If your mom has always taken pride in her appearance but now shows up with unkempt hair, mismatched clothes, or significant weight changes, don’t ignore it. Same goes for Dad suddenly wearing the same shirt three days in a row. A noticeable decline in hygiene or grooming might indicate memory issues, physical limitations, or even depression.

What to look for:

• Clothing that’s stained or inappropriate for the weather

• Unwashed hair or body odor

• Significant weight gain or loss

These physical signs can be early indicators that daily routines are becoming difficult to manage.

2. Red Flags with Aging Parent: Confusion or Forgetfulness

We all forget things like; where we put our keys, what we walked into the room for, but repeated confusion or forgetfulness that interferes with daily life is worth paying attention to.

Watch for moments like:

• Repeating the same question multiple times

• Telling the same story over and over (beyond the usual "dad jokes")

• Seeming disoriented in a familiar place, like their own kitchen

• Forgetting names of close family members or friends

Cognitive decline can be slow and subtle. What you notice now may be the breadcrumb trail to a bigger issue that needs attention.

3. Red Flags with Aging Parent: Mobility Struggles or Increased Frailty

Did you notice your mom struggling to get up from the couch? Or Dad holding onto walls as he walks down the hallway? These physical signs can be red flags that they’re at a higher risk of falling—a serious concern for older adults.

Other signs include:

• Shuffling feet when walking

• Avoiding stairs or hesitating before using them

• Needing to hold onto furniture to move through the room

Consider asking gently if they’ve had any recent falls or close calls. Most parents won't want to draw attention to an issue and will only bring it up if asked directly.

4. Red Flags with Aging Parent: Messy or Unsafe Living Environment

If you're spending time at your parents’ home this Easter, look around. Does their once-pristine kitchen now have expired food in the fridge? Is unopened mail piling up? Are there tripping hazards like loose rugs or electrical cords across walkways?

These changes may reflect difficulty managing daily tasks or waning judgment about safety and cleanliness.

Things to check:

• Burnt out lightbulbs or broken appliances

• Overflowing trash or spoiled food

• Piles of clutter or unpaid bills

If their environment has become noticeably disorganized or unsafe, it may be time to step in, or at least start the conversation.

5. Red Flags with Aging Parent: Social Withdrawal or Mood Changes

Was your dad always the first to start a conversation, but now seems quiet and withdrawn? Is your mom unusually irritable or anxious? Personality and mood changes can signal more than just a bad day.

Be on the lookout for:

• Avoiding group conversations or family traditions they once loved

• Expressing feelings of hopelessness or saying they feel like a burden

• Seeming overly anxious, paranoid, or emotionally flat

These changes might indicate loneliness, depression, or even the early stages of dementia. Even if it feels uncomfortable, bring it up with compassion.

6. Red Flags with Aging Parent: Difficulty with Conversation

If you notice your parent struggling to follow a conversation, searching for common words, or pausing mid-sentence in frustration, take note.

This can be especially telling in group settings like Easter dinner, where multiple conversations overlap and the background noise rises.

Watch for:

• Frequently asking people to repeat themselves

• Responding with vague or off-topic comments

• Appearing confused or lost during group interactions

  
  

Hearing loss can play a role here too, so it may not be memory—but it's still something to explore.

7. Red Flags with Aging Parent: Unopened Mail or Missed Medications

It might not come up unless you peek around, but Easter weekend is a chance to quietly check in on whether important tasks are getting done.

Check for:

• Piles of unopened mail (especially bills or notices)

• Empty or disorganized pill boxes

• Missed appointments or confusion about the date/time

These signs can point to a breakdown in executive functioning and a potential need for support with managing medications or finances.

What You Can Do (Without Causing a Family Scene)

This isn’t about ruining the holiday or staging an intervention over the Easter pie. It’s about taking note, listening between the lines, and gently starting a dialogue if needed. Being aware of Red Flags with aging parents is one thing, but being able to address them is the next stage.

Here are a few low-pressure ways to open the door:

“Hey Mom, I noticed the fridge looked a little emptier than usual—want to go grocery shopping tomorrow?”

“Dad, do you want me to take a look at the mail pile and help sort through it?”

“How have you been feeling lately? Anything been harder than usual?”

You don’t need all the answers right away. You just need awareness and curiosity.

Final Thought:

Easter Can Be a Check-In, Not Just a Celebration

As hard as it is to face, your parents won’t be independent forever. And while no one wants to spend Easter worrying about “what-if” scenarios, ignoring the signs now can lead to harder conversations later, often in a crisis.

This weekend, give hugs, pass the potatoes, and laugh at all the old stories. But also pay attention. Your future self, and your parents, will thank you.

Need help getting started with planning for your aging parents? Having trouble communicating with your siblings about your concerns?

Download my free guide “How to Talk to your Family About Aging Loved Ones” and start the conversation now before there’s an emergency.

-------------------------------------------------

Signed, your fellow sandwich gener,

Jenn

@jugglinggenerations